Psychiatric Hospital #2, Day 7

We got a surprise call from Javan just before nine this morning. The nurse told us that Javan did so well with his blood draw that he earned an extra phone call as a reward. We’d told them how difficult bloodwork is for him and we asked that they give him something orally first to calm him down. They did, and the nurse said that while he still screamed loudly the entire time, the nurses on each side of him were able to just hold his hands and didn’t really have to hold him down at all.

We got to visit him tonight for what I hope will be our last visitation before taking him home. We should hear tomorrow afternoon after he sees his hospital psychiatrist whether he’s ready to be released. Tonight, Javan was highly energetic and doing tons of sensory seeking. He was never still. He did lots of running bear hugs, backwards summersaults on the floor, ruffling mom and dad’s hair, karate kicking the air, circling the table, you name it. All this while in a cafeteria with several other families whose children were able to sit still and visit. Fortunately, his activity level didn’t seem to bother anyone since we were all pretty spread out.

He had a little notebook with him that he’d earned from the treasure chest a few days back for being on green for the day. It was full of plans for destroying the hospitals of the world. He talked a lot about that and interacted with his destruction team, who was still in the ceiling vent, with a series of hand signals. He pretended to cut a hole in the window so smoke bombs or gas bombs could be thrown in from the outside. It really bugs me that I can’t tell if he really believes those things or is just pretending. The professionals can’t tell either. I tried to get him to stick his hand through the hole he’d supposedly cut in the window, but he gave various reasons why he couldn’t. Does that mean he knows there’s not really a hole? When I suggested as much, he became very angry so I backed off.

Though he was active and mostly happy during our visit, he got very defiant a few minutes before our time was up and insisted that we would not leave him there tonight. He grasped our clothes in a death grip and wouldn’t let us go. When we pried him off, he tried to bite us so that he could grab our clothes again. He began to cry and plead with the nurse not to make his mommy and daddy leave him tonight. One of the other boys came over and was patting him on the back and telling him sweetly that it was going to be ok and he was going to get to go home soon and he had to be brave. What a sweetheart. We left him crying with the nurse. I cried all the way to the car and for a while in the parking lot before we left to grab dinner and head for our hotel room.

I really, really, really hope we get to bring him home tomorrow. I don’t want another visit. I want him home.

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